BENEFITS of Couples and Marriage Counselling :
Daniel believes in the capacity of secure relationships to act as a safe haven from which to grow and flourish in the world. Daniel’s highly practical approach has helped many couples to salvage their flailing, high conflict relationships, re-establish trust and re-awaken love. He works with all couples issues including pre-marital counselling, affairs and addiction issues within the relationship.
Benefits of working with Daniel:
- How to communicate in simple effective ways – how to state what is upsetting you and what you need in ways that your partner can understand without triggering their defensive responses.
- How to listen to and understand your partner without getting triggered.
- How to fight well. Conflict is inevitable. Daniel will help you to fight with pillows rather than knives, correcting injuries quickly.
- How to minimise each other’s stress and maximise each other’s well-being.
- How to become more flexible in problem solving.
To see Daniel’s main clinical influences view the following links
Daniel helps couples become an anchor for each other. Anchors know how to make their partner feel safe, included and prioritised and they know what makes their partner tick. Daniel teaches couples how to develop a ‘relationship first’ attitude. If both couples take care of the other person, both members of a couple will thrive in their lives. Daniel helps partners to strengthen attachment bonds, meaning that couples feel safe and connected together and know they are most important to their partner.
Daniel’s approach is highly practical. He helps by slowing things down, allowing for a new, healthier conversation to emerge. He holds both partners accountable for the relationships, encouraging them to operate from the healthiest and most adult part of themselves so they can learn how to take care of themselves and each other. Couples develop an ‘owners manual’ for each other, in the words of Stan Tatkin, a significant influence on Daniel’s approach. (see below for more info) When you work with Daniel you receive clear insight into the automatic behaviours you are operating from that don’t serve you or your relationship.
Relationship distress results from perceived threats to basic adult needs for safety, security and closeness in relationships. Seemingly petty arguments that occur over and over again in a relationship generally stem from deeper needs for security and feeling understood. Working with Daniel teaches both partners how understand the needs and how to give them to each other.
When working with couples, Daniel employs his training in Emotion focused couples therapy (EFT) and Psychobiological Approach to Couple Therapy (PACT)
“My husband and I were fortunate enough to find Daniel last year and we immediately starting counselling for my husbands substance problems. My husband has never seen a therapist and was in denial about his addiction. He was extremely hesitant to go to the first meeting. Daniel not only made my husband feel very comfortable, he helped us both understand that there was a much deeper issue than just a substance abuse. We spend 3-4 sessions discussing how we could better connect within our marriage and how we could substitute his substance urges for better martial connection. We are on the road to recovery and the majority of our petty arguments and fights have been resolved – Daniel has taught us the tools to better understand and communicate with each other. Daniel made such a huge impression on us – that my husband and I started seeing him individually to work on strategies for our career path. Daniel has an integrated approach to happiness and success by improving all aspects of your life: Love, work, family. I highly recommend his services – he has become an important ally in our marriage and success in Hong Kong. We owe Daniel a huge thank you for saving our marriage.”
J & T, Legal Services, Hong Kong
“Daniel has a wonderfully welcoming, relaxed style, making you feel instantly at ease in his company and trusting of his confidence. Spending time with him was like opening the curtains to our relationship, allowing us to see with clarity what our individual and collective needs and requirements are, and also to understand what buttons to try to avoid pressing, and how to deal with it when they sometimes, inevitably, get pressed. Our time with Daniel has been extremely rewarding and we’d like to thank him for all his listening, coaching and imparted wisdom.”
-B & N Investment Banking HK
His laser-sharp skills pick up on the subtle, yet incredibly vital, cues that lead to real transformation, unfolding, and ability to relate deeply and authentically. I highly recommend Daniel for anyone who is looking to heal, transform, or simply go deeper in their romantic relationships and connection with others.
– Krista B Designer, Boulder, CO
‘Daniel is extremely skilled at inviting both men and women to deepen into more intimacy and connection with each other, even amidst conflict or painful emotions. His style is a beautiful mix of friendly and compassionate but also powerful and directive’
– Lara I – Dating coach, Boulder, CO
‘Daniel has a rare gift for facilitating meaningful connections in the moment — felt experiences rather than mental concepts. These experiences show rather than tell couples how they can create more authentic, intimate, and satisfying relationships.’
– Allison C, Consultant, Cleveland, OH
To work with Daniel doing Couples therapy is a wonderful and a very valuable experience. As an individual, I am really learning how to love myself. Daniel is an amazing teacher, coach or therapist whatever you want to call it. He’s trustable and adaptable. I couldn’t have asked for more. Thank you so much, Daniel.
-Heather, Student, Denver, CO
Daniel’s rare combination of cognitive clarity and presence, tempered with a deeply authentic sensitivity, make him imminently qualified to facilitate personal growth work of all sorts. Working with Daniel has helped us grow as individuals, which over time has served to deepen our level of intimacy in both direct and subtle ways.
Greg T, Programmer, Denver, CO